When You’ve Got Doll Bodies and Time on Your Hands…

This.

wtf centipede

IT’S ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!!!

In a shocking development for me, I’m at a little bit of a loss for words on this one.  I’m not sure what I like best about this… I love that the dolls are carefully put together in descending order, best for it to take on the appearance of some fearsome segmented creature with many stomachs to satisfy.

Though the way it’s curved…it sort of looks like Randall from Monsters, Inc., no?

Say hello to the Scream Extractor.

Say hello to the Scream Extractor.
Image from pixar.wikia.com

I love that the head doll has weird, platinum-white hair à la the murderous, telepathic space-children from Village of the Damned.

Image from deathensemble.com

And I love that the baby face just looks so goddamned hungry.

The “WTF WordPress, really?” suggested tag for this post is “Antiques and Collectibles“.  While I can sort of logically determine why this would qualify as a legitimate suggestion, anyone who collects segmented doll carcass-pedes with a hankering for blood…well, that impulse really shouldn’t be legitimized.

~XOT

Photo found at Cthulhu Hand Luke‘s Facebook page, which is a bizarre, often hilarious, freak show full of awesome and I totally recommend that you check it out.

Sculpture…Torso…Thingie

IN HONOR OF THE “WHALE BONE PORN” MOTHER, I FEEL COMPELLED TO WARN YOU THAT THERE ARE BOOBIES–albeit weird ones–IN THIS PHOTO!  PROTECT YOUR CHILDREN!  SHIELD THINE PRECIOUS EYES!

censored 1

There I was, having a nice cup of hibiscus tea, when Dianna sent me an email.  “This one…it’s not like the others,” she said as a way of introducing her WTF-laden find.

When she’s right, she’s right.  I pulled up the attachment and nearly snarfed my tea.

Who's a special girl?

Who’s a special girl?

So, so so so.  Yes, yes yes yes.  Where do we begin?  Is it the crazed glass eye?  The sassy choker?  The overall, animal-head-on-human-torso design aesthetic?  Pretty sure it’s the skull from a wild boar and I don’t know if I take comfort in this or not, but if the WTF artist had just sold the skull as-is, sans torso, s/he probably could have gotten about $250 for it.  I confess I was so horrified yet mesmerized by the breasts with their nipples made out of…what are those?  Amplifier dials?…that I didn’t notice the television antennae attached to its bleached skull.  I suppose the antenna are so the she-beast can receive signals from its mother planet, and then pass them along to its human guardian.  Precious.

I can only hope those nipples go up to eleven.

The things you can find at a flea market these days.

So, seriously.  WTF?  I’m at a complete loss.

~XOT

(image taken from imgur)

Straight out of the pits of hell…

…and into your living room…

…Presenting…

OK, so look, before I present this item in question, let me just say that there are no words that will allow me to express just how demented this is.  Everything is wrong, wrong, wrong about this, from the hands for back feet to the roughspun wool body to the antlers to the human face to its vacant, hellspawn eyes.  Thankfully, the design heroes lightened things up a bit with a delightful spray of flowers.  Anyway.  Behold!  Feast your eyes on the wonder that is…

…ummm…

OK, see if you can figure this out.

One soul-eater, comin' up!

One soul-eater, comin’ up!

I like that there’s detritus around its hand-shaped feet, as though it just clawed its way in to your living room to sit in front of the TV and watch the latest episode of Snooki & Jwoww.  Because you know that show is a mega-hit in Hell.

Dianna, curator extraordinaire, says, “I can’t quite figure out what to say about it without dying inside a little,” and I think that sums it up.  All I have left to add is, WTF?

(photo from imgur)

~XOT